Things Change…

    Ain’t that the truth. Change is one of those things we know we can count on. This year has been full of change, and it is only May. Today, as my best friend, Brittany, drives across the country to relocate from Virginia to Washington, the topic of change is heavy on my head. A cross-country move is a considerable change, and I have been going through some on my end as well, so naturally, Brittany and I have been relying on our friendship at times to get through. So glad we have each other. One of the significant changes on my end will be starting at a new company next week. I’m thrilled about my new endeavor; however, there is also some stress involved when heading into the unknown. Even though change is a constant, we as humans are creatures of habit, and these worlds at times collide, making us a bit uncomfortable. Upside, this is a sure sign of growth! 

As I watch my friend start anew on the west coast, and I head into a new work family, we have been touching base and supporting each other as we go and have been sharing advice back and forth. I figure why not place some of this here in my blog where it may be of use to other eyes that fall upon it. 

1. Realize even good things can cause stress: Know that positive change can create stress just like not-so-positive change. Stress is just your body’s way of reacting to change. It’s okay to feel stressed even when something good has happened—in fact, it’s normal. So first, forgive yourself for feeling stress through any change. You’re human, right? 

2. Be willing to change: Change is uncomfortable. Are you ready to be a bit uncomfortable? You will need to be to get through your transition. There is that saying, “Nothing changes if nothing changes.” Who wants shit to be the same all the time? In general, change is a constant anyway, so I say to be optimistic and willing to accept that things are now different. It’s okay, my friend. It is just new, and you will surely figure it out.

In the case of Brit’s relocation, I helped her to see a new adventure that awaits. I mean, how cool is it to drive across the US and start your life in a whole different state, culture, climate, and coast. It is a great conversation piece for sure. This leads me to my next tip…

3. Lean on your positive support system: Just like Brit can call me and I’ll have her seeing the sunny side in no time, she does the same for me! Try gearing the conversation toward action: What can you do to make things better? When people brainstorm together, creativity and hopefulness can be contagious as well. We all have people in our lives we know can get us through a hard time or a change. Do yourself a favor…. Call them! That is what friends are for. On the flip side, my next tip…..

4. Leave the naysayers behind. Do not expect the negative people in your life, and many of us, unfortunately, have them, to help you through change. If anything, these people will get in your way. Sure, not everything needs to be sunshine and rainbows, but you know what I mean. You don’t need anyone getting in your head with negativity about your new circumstance during significant changes. This may show up as doubt about your abilities, cynicism, comparing, judgemental, making you prove or defend anything to them, or trying to manipulate your feelings on the change in a negative way. Yes, even if this person is close to you, don’t seek them out during these times. Change is challenging enough, and we don’t need nobody killin’ our vibes, right?

5. Be Proactive: If there is something you can do to prepare for the change… Do it! Do as much to prepare as you can. It will set you for success, but more importantly, you will be more busy doing than thinking. Sometimes our mind is our worst enemy. Take action. Example from my current situation: I decided to study up on my new industry, company, and took a mini-course to sharpen my skills before day one. I feel great about giving myself a head start and feel like I am heading in with a good sense of what is what!

6. Exercise and eat healthy: Our habits here look different for all. With Brit and myself, she tends not to eat when stressed, and I tend to overeat when stressed. Can’t lie; I wish I had her habit with this one! The critical piece here is to be aware first and foremost. I know I have a ton going on, so I make a conscious effort. I am making sure to take care of myself during this time. I have been doing my best to sleep well, eat well, and do a 30-minute workout every day. We ordered pizza the other night, but 2 slices and I headed right down for my workout after and ate well; otherwise, through this uncertain period. I’ll take it!

 7. My biggest tip would be to maintain flexibility and adjust and pivot as you need. I like to refer to this quote in such times.

“The pessimist complains about the wind. The optimist expects it to change. The leader adjusts its sails.” – John Maxwell    

You, my friend, are the leader of your life, and being able to adjust your sails when needed is what gets you through a change in weather.

8.Give yourself a break: This is last but certainly not least. Listen, change is tough. Ultimately, you are tougher. You have gotten through many other changes before, and I have zero doubt you can triumph through this next transition. Listen to your body and mind during times of change, and allow yourself to take a moment when you need a moment. I am not the greatest at taking my own advice here, but I’m working on it. Be kind to yourself as you adapt to the change. Allow for mistakes as you learn. Let your new experience continue to build your arsenal of I cans and I dids! 

Brittany’s got this, I got this, and my dear friend, you got this!

With Love
-T